OK, BECAUSE LIKE THREE OF YOU HAVE ASKED, A SHORT LIST OF DUMB SHIT I’VE SEEN TOURISTS DO:
Try to RIDE the bison. The one-ton pile of Pissed off Pot Roast with the horns than can rip your intestines right out, the bone-smashing hooves and YES IT CAN RUN 40 MPH THAT IS NOT A JOKE. Was grabbed by my mother before she could get her ass killed.
Let chihuahuas, pugs and other toy dogs run loose in the park. Where they can eat endangered small reptiles and mammals, or be eaten by coyotes.
Listen to ranger talk about the importance of staying the fuck on the trail, or you could fall through the ground into the thermal pools and boil to death. IMMEDIATELY steps off the trail to get closer to the 2000 degree Pool.
The Exact Same As Above, but with a barely-frozen-over lake.
Carve their names over Native American Petroglyphs. Was offended when pulled away by and fined by a Ranger. Got a bigger fine for spitting on the Ranger and trying to punch them.
Getting drunk and trying to piss out the Junior Ranger’s campfire.
“HEY RANGER I FOUND A LOST DOG!” The thing they have in the box is a Badger.
Got screamed at by a wildlife photographer who’d been camping out trying to get pictures of baby foxes in their den. He went inside to take a piss, missed them, so I showed him the pictures I took to make him feel better. He punched me, Stole my camera, then got tackled into the pavement by my sister to get my camera back. I was 11 at the time.
OH AND THE QUESTIONS:
“What time of year to the deer turn into elk?” EVERY GODAMN YEAR.
*Pointing at a Glacier* What’s that white stuff up on the mountain?”
“What time do we get to feed the bears?”
Tourist: “Does Old Faithful work on Christmas?” Ranger: “Yes. Several times a day, every day. It’s a natural feature-” Tourist: “Why would you force them to work on a Christian holiday!?” Ranger: “Who?” Tourist: “The Men Undergound that operate the spring! They should at least get Chistmas off!” Ranger, clearly done with this shit: “…They’re Jewish.”
Alternative: I go by “Ship”, but I’m also dating someone named “Computer”.
Someone: “Computer, what is there to know about [group of people]?” Computer: “They’re a bunch of pricks, I can tell you that much.” Someone: “Oh, fuck, I wasn’t asking you. I was addressing the ship’s computer. As I was saying–” Computer: “Jeez, I know we’re dating, but I wouldn’t use the possessive!” Someone: “I swear I will open the airlock and send you both into space with your stupid names, so help me.”
I mean, if Syri and Lexa are anything to go by, the ship’s computer will be the one character with a normal name
The human crew of my starship: Ship, Computer, Digit, Fidget, Rat, Lynx, Rune, Sine, Nova, Cipher, Chai, Delta, Vega, Trig, Zero, Clue The obligatory highly-advanced AI android character: Hubert
it amuses me to see people being surprised/impressed/amused by this setup, because it’s extremely common on the plains. if you don’t plant a windbreak, your heating and cooling bills are huge, and storms do things like throw the lawnmower through the living room window, take the roof off, or cake the entire north side of the house with six inches of solid ice.
evergreens remain bendy even in the coldest weather, so – wait, no, not the coldest. i remember when i was a kid it got down to like -45 and the norway pines around my house were cracking like gunshots as the sap froze.
maples, incidentally, make that noise around -20f, and i hear it at least once every winter here in southern minnesota. but i only ever heard norway pines make it that one time.
so anyway that’s why we plant pine trees around our houses. because otherwise the wind would freaking kill us.
This is informative and perfectly sensible under the circumstances but I also cannot resist the temptation to compare it to planting stuff all around the boundary of your lot in The Sims
I reblogged this like a year and a half ago and IT CONTINUES!?
ITS BACK OMG
Omg it’s here!
THIS CUTE I WANNA CONTINUE IT
Ok I tried because this is so cute
OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDFFDFF
IT GOT EVEN BETTER OMG
This has to be the most adorable thing I’ve seen today.
This gave me so many happy and cute feels
every time this circles back there’s always more, I love you all
this warms my heart on so many levels ❤
ITS BACK
I’m just sitting here
Hitting my knee
Squealing and smiling omfg
this is now a tumblr web comic, who knows when the next upate is, all we know is its gonna be fucking amazing when it happens
best thing ever
Traditional style (Sorry the picture quality is really bad) but here is my (super short) update!!
(The text says : Movie? I won’t be late!)
my contribution!
This is beautiful
Love it
OMG I REMEMBER THIS!!! AND THIS IS SO LONG NOW AND SO ADORABLE!!! I LOVE ALL THE DIFFERENT ART STYLES!!
I love this so much. For multiple reasons. One all of the different art styles. Two I have been seen this post around Tumblr ever since I first came here. And three ever since I first came it’s been getting longer and better ever cents!
This is some cute shit
This has been here since the start of my blog and it’s one of my favourite posts that I had on my dash and it still is
Even after all this time I’m so invested in this
I
I AM SPEECHLESS
I love this so much😭😭😭
thiS IS THE ABSOLUTE MOST ADORABLE THING EVER XD
THIS IS SO CUTE I’M ACTUALLY SCREAMING
I’M SCREAMING
I’m crying and dying and screaming how is this possible
GOD I’M LITERALLY SO SORRY TO BOTHER ALL OF YOU GUYS BUT YOUR ART STYLES ARE NOTORIOUSLY AMAZING AND IF ANY ONE OF YOU WERE ABLE TO MAKE A CONTINUATION OF THIS I WOULD DIE HAPPY
Johns Hopkins Computer Science prof Professor Peter Fröhlich grades his
students on a curve: the highest score on the final gets an A and
everyone else is graded accordingly.
Clever students in Fröhlich’s “Intermediate Programming”, “Computer
System Fundamentals,” and “Introduction to Programming for Scientists
and Engineers” figured out that this meant that if they all boycotted
the exam, they’d all get As.
So they organized a boycott, milling around the hall outside the class
where the exams were being sat, sternly reminding each other that if no
one sat the exam they’d all get straight As, ignoring Fröhlich’s pleas
to come and sit the exam.
Fröhlich praised his students’ solidarity: “The students learned that by
coming together, they can achieve something that individually they
could never have done. At a school that is known (perhaps unjustly) for
competitiveness I didn’t expect that reaching such an agreement was
possible.”
missionlameturtle 